Bleedy

Got a nice cut across the back of my right hand the other day, and it doesn't seem to want to heal. I was trying to duct-tape up the plexiglass inserts to the double steel storm back doors, when I accidentally dragged my hand across a jagged shard of safety glass (irony implied) sticking out of the interior sliding door. The glass in said sliding door was shattered like ten years ago, but the shards are still there. Maggie the lovable but ridiculously destructive rottweiler popped the plexi out for about the fifth time trying to get into the house. See, my deadbeat neighbors stopped paying rent and got kicked out of their house, and they abandoned about 7 cats and Maggie. As for the cats, I think most of them have wandered completely out of the neighborhood by now.

So screw my bleeding, doesn't matter. I've seen so many movies lately I can't possibly get into detailed reviews, because I got three hours of sleep last night and I've been up for 20 hours now. So here's the gist:

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy: Funny, at times very funny, but only if you can immediately browse through all the DVD extras. Also, I still have "Afternoon Delight" running through my head.

Shaun of the Dead: Not only is this the funniest movie of the year, it's also up there with Lost in Translation and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind as both hilarious and meticulously well-crafted. Plus, it's got zombies, motherfucker!

Dreamcatcher: Extremely well acted, particularly Damian Lewis and Donnie Walberg, and at times nice and scary, but the pacing is all wrong, and it just gets tedious. Beautiful cinematography, though.

Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story: Unlike Anchorman, a great party movie, as it is gratuitously and immediately funny due to all the shots of people getting whomped in the face with shit. The deleted scenes consist mostly of character development, which is useless in this kind of movie. My suggestion? Buy the VHS. It's cheaper, and more the the point.

Stuck On You: Greg Kinnear and Matt Damon are conjoined twins, and wackiness ensues! Or not. Stupid and unfunny and predictable and I haven't looked at the extra features yet, but I'm not holding my breath.

The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King Extended DVD Edition: Nearly an hour of additional footage, scattered evenly throughout the already epic-length film, but it really is only for total Tolkien geeks like myself. I just bought the thing this afternoon, so I haven't gone through the two DVDs of bonus material yet, but if it's anything like the quality of the extended editions of The Fellowship of the Ring and The Two Towers, it's well worth just thirty bucks.